BamBiPurr
12-20-2003, 02:04 AM
My son Wyatt was much younger, since this story happened several years ago. He is now 8, but he was only perhaps maybe 6 when this occured.
I had been divorced from Wyatt's dad for a few years, and Wyatt stayed with his dad every weekend. During one of these weekends, I had to put one of our older cats at the time, down. Her name was Trouble; a half siamese and very sweet. She happened to be one of Wyatt's favorite cats, as well. Over the last few months I'd noticed that the quality of her life was not good...all she did was sleep in the sun in the spare room until the sun went down, then went and slept under the bathroom cabinet. She had stopped mingling with the us and the other cats, and was getting slower and slower. I knew something was not right...I just know my animals very well. I agonized for days about what to do. Should I 'wait and see', and perhaps cause her pain, or help her go peacefully? I am an animal lover to the umpth degree, and as I said, I KNEW something was wrong with Trouble. My heart was breaking when I finally made my decision, and after much prayer, knew that just being alive was not really living. She had lost a lot of weight in two months, and I had talked to Wyatt several times, saying that Trouble was getting old and may not be well. She was 16.
With a heavy heart, that Saturday, I took her to the vet after work, and my suspicions were verified. She was not well. Being a generic cat, the prognosis was not promising. *sighs* With tears in my eyes, I gave my consent. While the vet was out of the room, preparing the injection, I held my beloved cat close, stroking her fur, whispering in her ear how much I loved her, and getting a purr from her for the first time in a long time. My tears fell on her soft fur as I struggled to restrain myself so as to not upset and stress her. Damn how I loved my sweet little girl kitty! After the deed was done, I took my Trouble's lifeless body home, and late that night, with reddened, swollen eyes, and a very heavy heart, buried her with tears flowing and prayers cried out.
Sunday afternoon Wyatt came home from his dad's place and I had to sadly tell him our Trouble was gone. I alway agonize over my decisions when I have to decide to put a cat of ours down...did I do the right thing? Should I have waited a little bit more? Could I have done something to avoid having to do it? I am a basket case emotionally...to us, they are family. Wyatt was naturally upset, but as I'm always honest with my son, told him what transpired that afternoon, and how I whispered my love in her ear, pet her, hugged her, how she suddenly started purring..the whole thing so he would know I was with her the whole time.
Late that night, around 2 or 3 AM, Wyatt awoke screaming and hysterically crying. He was babbling about Trouble, and blood, and mean people. Then he said he was going to throw up. I felt his head and he was burning up with fever. The thermometer read 101 and I knew that I had to get it down. After cool compresses to calm him, I took him into the shower and let cool water run over us. After getting out, I managed to get him to keep down some ibuprophen, and when he was feeling better, he started telling me about a nightmare he had:
"I heard Trouble crying mom, so I followed her cry and saw her go into a house. I went in too, and I saw mean people sticking knives into her. Then there was blood all over...in the room, in the hall, coming out the door! Mom, Trouble was crying and they were killing her! It was terrible mom (he is crying really hard now, despite me trying to calm him) Mom...I miss Trouble!!!"
My heart shredded anew, all my own pain over Trouble back again in full force. I held Wyatt close as we lay in my bed, and I told him again what really happened the night Trouble left this earth. Nobody stuck knives into her, there was no blood, and he knows I do NOT lie to him about anything. I also told him how fevers sometimes get things mixed up in a person's mind, and how it gets things jumbled because the mind is busy with the fever. Nightmares happen a lot when a high fever is present.
I then suggested perhaps we should pray and ask for his angels, (we believe that everyone has their own angels, besides the angels with general assignments...and angels cannot interfere unless you ask for their help/wisdom/guidance)ALL his angels, to come to him tonight and stay with him and hold him close so he can sleep peacefully, and let them let him know that Trouble left this earth in peace with my love sending her. Upon finishing that prayer, Wyatt almost immediately snuggled up to me and fell asleep and stayed asleep til mid morning.
Later that morning, I casually asked how he was feeling. He said he felt better. I then mentioned that he fell asleep immediately after I finished praying. I tried not to 'lead' him into saying anything, so left a lot of my observations just hanging as I made breakfast. He immediately said,
"Mom, didn't you see them last night? Before you finished praying they were ALL OVER! There were so many they filled the room, mom! They were everywhere...even on the ceiling!!! And then they lifted up the bed, and then they lifted up the house to keep us safe!!!!! There were big angels and little angels...didn't you see them!?? Their light made the bedroom look like daytime!"
Not wanting to show surprise or lead him still, I kept my voice casual, "Hmmm...I must have fallen asleep right away too because I felt them but didn't see them. So they lifted up the bed AND the house? So what...(using logical reasoning) the little ones lifted up the bed and the big ones lifted up the house? Cool"
"Noooo....there were a LOT of little ones mom..THEY lifted up the house...the big ones lifted up our bed and stayed with us all night. You didn't see them????!!! "
Mmmm hmmmm. Well, I know my son, even then, and I KNOW what he said was the complete truth, said in innocent belief. Isn't that why children see 'things' more than adults, after all? Their innocent belief in what they SEE and not what they've 'learned' is 'real', or what some perceive as 'real'? I had not doubt then, and absolutely no doubt today, that what he relayed to me that morning, did, in fact, happen that night. I felt it. I practically begged the angels...All of them mind you, to come to my son and comfort and protect him that night. In a mother's desperate attempt to soothe her son, I did ask. And they did come. All of them.
Wyatt has not had another bad dream about Trouble since that night. And when he feels someone is outside, or feels that creepy feeling most of us have felt in their gut that bad is lurking closeby, he knows what to do. After that discussion that morning, I laughed and said, "Ooops....guess next time we pray for our angels to come to us and protect us or comfort us, perhaps we shouldn't ask for ALL of them! You seem to have a whole lot of them honey!" Wyatt and I know our angels will always come when we put out the call. And they will always hold us close. What a wonderful gift God has given us all!
I had been divorced from Wyatt's dad for a few years, and Wyatt stayed with his dad every weekend. During one of these weekends, I had to put one of our older cats at the time, down. Her name was Trouble; a half siamese and very sweet. She happened to be one of Wyatt's favorite cats, as well. Over the last few months I'd noticed that the quality of her life was not good...all she did was sleep in the sun in the spare room until the sun went down, then went and slept under the bathroom cabinet. She had stopped mingling with the us and the other cats, and was getting slower and slower. I knew something was not right...I just know my animals very well. I agonized for days about what to do. Should I 'wait and see', and perhaps cause her pain, or help her go peacefully? I am an animal lover to the umpth degree, and as I said, I KNEW something was wrong with Trouble. My heart was breaking when I finally made my decision, and after much prayer, knew that just being alive was not really living. She had lost a lot of weight in two months, and I had talked to Wyatt several times, saying that Trouble was getting old and may not be well. She was 16.
With a heavy heart, that Saturday, I took her to the vet after work, and my suspicions were verified. She was not well. Being a generic cat, the prognosis was not promising. *sighs* With tears in my eyes, I gave my consent. While the vet was out of the room, preparing the injection, I held my beloved cat close, stroking her fur, whispering in her ear how much I loved her, and getting a purr from her for the first time in a long time. My tears fell on her soft fur as I struggled to restrain myself so as to not upset and stress her. Damn how I loved my sweet little girl kitty! After the deed was done, I took my Trouble's lifeless body home, and late that night, with reddened, swollen eyes, and a very heavy heart, buried her with tears flowing and prayers cried out.
Sunday afternoon Wyatt came home from his dad's place and I had to sadly tell him our Trouble was gone. I alway agonize over my decisions when I have to decide to put a cat of ours down...did I do the right thing? Should I have waited a little bit more? Could I have done something to avoid having to do it? I am a basket case emotionally...to us, they are family. Wyatt was naturally upset, but as I'm always honest with my son, told him what transpired that afternoon, and how I whispered my love in her ear, pet her, hugged her, how she suddenly started purring..the whole thing so he would know I was with her the whole time.
Late that night, around 2 or 3 AM, Wyatt awoke screaming and hysterically crying. He was babbling about Trouble, and blood, and mean people. Then he said he was going to throw up. I felt his head and he was burning up with fever. The thermometer read 101 and I knew that I had to get it down. After cool compresses to calm him, I took him into the shower and let cool water run over us. After getting out, I managed to get him to keep down some ibuprophen, and when he was feeling better, he started telling me about a nightmare he had:
"I heard Trouble crying mom, so I followed her cry and saw her go into a house. I went in too, and I saw mean people sticking knives into her. Then there was blood all over...in the room, in the hall, coming out the door! Mom, Trouble was crying and they were killing her! It was terrible mom (he is crying really hard now, despite me trying to calm him) Mom...I miss Trouble!!!"
My heart shredded anew, all my own pain over Trouble back again in full force. I held Wyatt close as we lay in my bed, and I told him again what really happened the night Trouble left this earth. Nobody stuck knives into her, there was no blood, and he knows I do NOT lie to him about anything. I also told him how fevers sometimes get things mixed up in a person's mind, and how it gets things jumbled because the mind is busy with the fever. Nightmares happen a lot when a high fever is present.
I then suggested perhaps we should pray and ask for his angels, (we believe that everyone has their own angels, besides the angels with general assignments...and angels cannot interfere unless you ask for their help/wisdom/guidance)ALL his angels, to come to him tonight and stay with him and hold him close so he can sleep peacefully, and let them let him know that Trouble left this earth in peace with my love sending her. Upon finishing that prayer, Wyatt almost immediately snuggled up to me and fell asleep and stayed asleep til mid morning.
Later that morning, I casually asked how he was feeling. He said he felt better. I then mentioned that he fell asleep immediately after I finished praying. I tried not to 'lead' him into saying anything, so left a lot of my observations just hanging as I made breakfast. He immediately said,
"Mom, didn't you see them last night? Before you finished praying they were ALL OVER! There were so many they filled the room, mom! They were everywhere...even on the ceiling!!! And then they lifted up the bed, and then they lifted up the house to keep us safe!!!!! There were big angels and little angels...didn't you see them!?? Their light made the bedroom look like daytime!"
Not wanting to show surprise or lead him still, I kept my voice casual, "Hmmm...I must have fallen asleep right away too because I felt them but didn't see them. So they lifted up the bed AND the house? So what...(using logical reasoning) the little ones lifted up the bed and the big ones lifted up the house? Cool"
"Noooo....there were a LOT of little ones mom..THEY lifted up the house...the big ones lifted up our bed and stayed with us all night. You didn't see them????!!! "
Mmmm hmmmm. Well, I know my son, even then, and I KNOW what he said was the complete truth, said in innocent belief. Isn't that why children see 'things' more than adults, after all? Their innocent belief in what they SEE and not what they've 'learned' is 'real', or what some perceive as 'real'? I had not doubt then, and absolutely no doubt today, that what he relayed to me that morning, did, in fact, happen that night. I felt it. I practically begged the angels...All of them mind you, to come to my son and comfort and protect him that night. In a mother's desperate attempt to soothe her son, I did ask. And they did come. All of them.
Wyatt has not had another bad dream about Trouble since that night. And when he feels someone is outside, or feels that creepy feeling most of us have felt in their gut that bad is lurking closeby, he knows what to do. After that discussion that morning, I laughed and said, "Ooops....guess next time we pray for our angels to come to us and protect us or comfort us, perhaps we shouldn't ask for ALL of them! You seem to have a whole lot of them honey!" Wyatt and I know our angels will always come when we put out the call. And they will always hold us close. What a wonderful gift God has given us all!