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spunky22
02-19-2004, 12:34 AM
As she
(she being the girl I once was)
walked out of the smoky haze
I realized that remnants
of my life
lied in her smile
her silver sparkling hair,
the moon played tricks
upon my fragile eyes.

I remembered those nights
under the stars,
I remembered the sea.
Oh the sea!
How could I have let myself forget
lingering smells of spices and salt,
breeze lofting through
not making you too cold
only succumbing when you
asked it
politely


laying here upon this cliff
I felt as though it
would be best
to let
myself fall,
then my remnants
could be splattered
upon the cold,
unforgiving earth.
how tempting it was.
I looked up at the same sky
I remembered who I once was.
Where had she gone?
The misty reflection
I laid here
on the earth
I could feel
against my stomach
coolness of a plant
I was laying
on top of.
right near my ankle
I could feel a piece of gravel
bearing into me,
almost taunting me
to put force against it
so that my skin would tear,
and the gravel could be lodged inside me.
The gravel could be a part of me.
My head
and half of my torso were
letting gravity pull me
over the edge,
I didn’t ever believe in miracles.

Dandylion
02-19-2004, 01:30 PM
This is wonderful...I love how you described laying on the ground and all that you felt. Sometimes I need to feel pain just so I can feel something...this is dark and beautiful~Dandy

spunky22
02-19-2004, 07:23 PM
oh, but isn't it always?
thanks a lot for your imput Dandy, I really appreciate it
Marji

Territorial Hawk
02-24-2004, 10:42 PM
Spunky,

wicked.

spunky22
02-24-2004, 11:29 PM
Thanks a lot Hawk! I always appreciate your words! Especially "wicked" what an awesome word! ha!
thanks,
Marji

iblieve
02-24-2004, 11:39 PM
Yep those rocks sting, you use words to describe the feeling of your surrounding beautifully. It added much depth to this poem. iblieve

Territorial Hawk
02-25-2004, 06:14 AM
Spunky,

:D

spunky22
02-25-2004, 07:20 PM
thanks iblieve :-)! and Hawk :D