spring

[joni-marie]

sun in yellow splendor
paints a day in moon’s soft glow
with fingers warm embraces
cold leaves left from winter’s snow

near a splintered fence
small shy daisy glances
raises supple arms of green
in simple abstract dances

on brown barren limbs
blossoms blush pure white
while overhead
small sparrows sing
in obvious delight

in an air of clouded mist
spring inhales a welcome breath
slow sings a song of summer
impatient to be free

[Beki]

painted most beautifully and great use of rhyme too :)

[laleesh]

oh joni, this is beautiful; soft, subtle and pastel.


and that's not a sparrow - that's me! LOL!!
:)
laleesh

[joni-marie]

beki, gray and laleesh....

thank you! we have been having beautiful days!

joni-marie

[Michael]

This is lovely, joni-marie. Nice images, good rhyme, as Beki says.

Actually, I like the interesting and refreshing way that you use rhyme in this piece. You go from a semi-alternate rhyme scheme, to a five lined stanza with a sort of improvised rhyme which very nicely segues into a totally unrhymed stanza. Great move!

It’s that last stanza that I like the best.
Originally posted by joni-marie
in an air of clouded mist
spring inhales a welcome breath
slow sings a song of summer
impatient to be free
I think the entire piece is wonderful, but that last stanza contains so much. It’s refreshing, it’s got music in it and it’s got some awesome alliteration.

Nice poem, joni-marie.

[joni-marie]

i thank you very much, michael.....
for your kind and thoughtful comments!

joni-marie