To Gather the Sunshine

[wandelaar]

Looking out of my window
towards the rolling hills
I smell the freedom
of the chiffon clouds
languishing above
or just touching
the sturdy tree tops.

It is May, and the flaming
of Jacaranda
forms a burning contrast
to the cool green
of gracious Bamboo.
I hear the soft whisper
of the long waving leaves
telling secrets to the wind

Here in my peaceful garden
the pulsing Hummingbird
sips hurriedly in the welcome
cup of yellow Hibiscus.
He has many stops to make
before the day is done.
I enjoy the mellow sweetness
of nectar on my tongue.

Watch the busy ants marching
along the narrow trail;
See them work to earn their dinner
lugging a spider
heavy and big and black.
Hup, hup, hup!
Left, right, left!
Sergeant keeps them on their toes
Holding the grindstone to their nose

[Michael]

lilaj, you depict a busy but colorful scene. The imagery is well stated and creates the vision I’m certain you want the reader to experience.

The visualization contrast in the second verse is especially keen.
Originally posted by wandelaar
It is May, and the flaming
of Jacaranda
forms a burning contrast
to the cool green
of gracious Bamboo.
I hear the soft whisper
of the long waving leaves
telling secrets to the wind
I also like the way you subtly work in the time of year.

Very nice, excepting, of course, for the fact that you have to return to your sick bed.

If this is just a poem, merely fiction, it’s done well right to the end.

If it’s non fiction, it’s still done well, but I’ll add that I hope you feel better soon. :)

[Territorial Hawk]

What a beautiful image.

[wandelaar]

Hi Michael,

Thank you for reading and for your compliment! I am , except for a bit of trouble with my hay-fever not sick at all but used that line to round off the piece but I appreciate your good wished any way.


Hawk, thank youfor reading andfor taking time to post a reply,

greetings,

[judih]

hi lilaj

i enjoyed the poem, but as for rounding off the piece, your rhyming couplet does the job - there's no technical need to add the element of you being sick, unless you want to attract sympathy for a problem.

Leaving it without the last two lines keeps it pristinely a Nature poem - a celebration of observation.

judih
*peace*

[wandelaar]

Hi Judith,

You might just be right and I will consider removing it altogether!

Thank you for viewing and the response,

greetings,

[Poeticpiers]

A vision of life well presented I can see the scene clarly bar for the jacaranda tree as I have no refernce to draw upon
Vividly portrayed in words which the form enhances

[wandelaar]

Hi Poeticpiers,

Thank you for reading and posting a response to this piece.
A Jacaranda tree is sometimes called Flame of the Forest because it bears flowers that are the colour of orange red flames and from a distance seems to be on fire. I hope the picture is better now!

[naturalist]

I agree many wonderful images, rally well done! Thank you for sharing your work. I look forward to more.

[wandelaar]

Hi Naturalis,

Thank you for reading and postinga reply. I hope to be setting more of my work on the site and I hope that they will be a joy to read.
greetings,