judih

It was slight comfort finding out that it wasn't just a Negev desert weather storm, but rather a phenomenon that grabbed the whole country, but what a windstorm we had today.

In the morning, on the way to school, I shot some photos of palm trees waving in the wind, thinking it was a one-time opportunity.

However, just as I finally helped my 12th grade English class get into the rhythm of exam taking, there was a huge creak, a thud and then the lights went out.
...

whistle at me
=chauvinist
slap me
-aggressor
insult me
-slanderer

i whistle at you
- liberated
i slap you
- angry bitch
i insult you
-below the belt

explode a rocket at me
-oppressed people
blow yourself up
-desperate for freedom
push children to the front
-garner world sympathy

i blow up your rocket launch pad
-aggressor...

it's one of those crying days
sick of my life
sick of my job
sick of feeling alone
sick of hearing others' pain
sick of being unable to help
sick of endless troubles

a day for crying
to let out the sick
to psyche out the demons of helpless impotence
too sick to bother a friend
too upset to cry to my man

a day of lonely despair

So, i've decided that i have to go back to morning journalling. i need to come back to serious inner centrallization. And hopefully find myself in amongst the hundred scattered thoughts about other people.

So, here i am after my morning journalling and i've come to realize that i'm merely a pot holder, and a clumsy one at that.

i clutch onto a cast iron pot, allowing thoughts, words, experiences to collect. i stand and hold the pot while it fills up. (i dare not claim...

til Monday, i'm in heaven
daughter's here till Monday
then i expect i'll examine st. john's wort
slump into tears
try to stitch together my fragments
and carry on.
but right now, i'm in Glow City